A Modest Proposal
People from other countries always admire
Canada’s free medical treatment. Even our neighbor---- The USA does not have
free medical treatment. Canadians are always proud of their good welfare
provided by the government. This is also one of the main reasons my family
immigrated to Canada. However, after spending almost two years in Canada, I
realized that Canada’s free medical treatment is not as good as it looks.
Half a year ago, I first “enjoyed” Canada’s
medical treatment. It was a Saturday, and I sprained my ankle badly while
playing tennis. My father and I decided to go to hospital to make sure that I
did not break my bones. So we went to the ER of a hospital. We registered at
the front desk, and the nurse told us to wait. So we waited patiently for
almost three hours. The doctor only spent 10 minutes to check my ankle. Well,
the treatment is free, but I would rather pay for the treatment instead of
waiting three hours. I told my experiences to my friend who was born in Canada.
He told me that it is totally normal to wait for three hours in an ER in
Canada. In China, the medical treatment is not free, but patients NEVER have to
wait in an ER!
After
thinking hard, I figured out a method that can help you get free treatment as
soon as you walk in an ER. This method requires some acting skills. The main
point of this method is to act as painfully as you can. You have to infinitely exaggerate
your pain in order to get attention from nurses. For example, even though you
sprained your ankle slightly, you have to act like your bone is broken or your
foot is no longer connected to your leg. You must not walk in the ER, you have
to crawl. Scream and groan are also necessary. Once you get people’s attention,
you are half way succeeded. You do not even have to register at the front desk.
The only things you have to do are lying on the ground and wait for people to
treat you. Please relax, the wait would not take you more than two minutes.
I
really think this is a good method. It requires no money and preparation. You
do not have to be very good acting. Actually, if you can scream, that will be
enough. If you really worry about your acting, you can practice at home. The
only thing you need is a mirror. You want professional guidance? That is easy,
too. You can watch action movies to learn how to act from professional actors.
There
are some things that you have to pay attention when you are acting at
hospitals. If you have a backache, please do not act like your ankle is in
violent pain. It sounds ridiculous, but it is possible. When you are acting,
you may get too excited and forget what you are doing. If the doctor finds out
that you are acting, you are in trouble. Also, do not act too exaggeratedly. If
you act too much, people may think you have mental diseases. Remember that you
are in a hospital, once your diagnosis says you have mental diseases, you are in
big trouble.
Medical
treatment is a serious problem in Canada right now. Many diseases are acute,
and people die in ERs because of missing the golden hours of treatment. It’s
not because they go to hospital too late, but the waiting hours in ERs are too
long, which is ridiculous. The government should really do something to solve
this problem. If the problem is not solved, patients may really start to act in
ERs, which could cause more and more serious problems.
